Separation – it’s always been a word I dread.
Fear of being alone in my room with nothing but my thoughts to fill my head.
Thoughts that betray me and reveal the depths of my sorrow.
Wishing, waiting that they would leave me in the morrow.
When I am alone in my room there is nothing to hold me but my thoughts. It’s scary to be there when you are sure that those thoughts will not be pure. So I run and hide from them.
But what if the thoughts are pure? What if thinking actually brings joy? Being alone in my room would no longer be scary, but desired.
Three days ago, I said goodbye to a friend. Not too long ago, this would have filled me with fear and dread. And though I know I will miss my time with her dearly, I don’t have the sorrow of my past. I have found peace in my thoughts because they are pure. Thinking of the times we shared reveals the gift I was given of being set free to love. Instead of the fear, I have a strange, yet appealing, feeling of peace and radiant joy. At the end of the thoughts one word remains – hope! Hope – that we will meet again and it will be sure that the times together were not in vain. Hope – that this joy that I am feeling today will be a continued joy. Hope – that being alone in my room will reveal more of the beauty of God within as i allow myself the freedom to think.
I know in my soul that my life will never be the same because of this most precious gift – the gift of hope.
